Thursday, September 30, 2010
I was reading up on a post on blacktating, about the use of the word "intimacy" while referring to breastfeeding. I think it is silly to have the word be put into question when it has a whole lot of meanings...
To me it's like saying I can't say I love my children because I love my husband. Love has a lot of meanings, I love my children, I love my husband, I love chocolate, doesn't mean it's all in the same context.
Wikipedia has an elaborate page on the word intimacy, the first lines state the following, "Intimacy generally refers to the feeling of being in a close personal association and belonging together. It is a familiar and very close affective connection with another as a result of a bond that is formed through knowledge and experience of the other". Wouldn't you agree that is something that is experienced while feeding your child?
Anyway, this is not what I am going to get into.. the whole post got me thinking..
NIP is PDA!
PDA originally refers to people being amorous in public. "public display of affection" be it kissing, holding hands, hugging... sure people think of it as a sexual term but if you think about it we as mothers when we nurse in public are displaying how much affection we have for our children.
Enough affection to not whisk them away to a bathroom, or a hot car or to keep them indoors because of what others might think.
So from now on I will say PDA not NIP ;)
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
At one point I considered strollers as a great way for baby to get fresh air and yes they are but ideally during a long walk a baby should be worn safe in mommy/daddy's arms, hips, back.. or facing the pusher where baby can see familiar faces and be reassured.
I currently wear my baby or when necessary I stroll her with the car seat attached so that she may face me.I talk to her comfort her and make silly faces along the ride, I love seeing her reactions to the world.
I just saw this video produced by Norland College (Bath, England) it's a 10 minute video of a forward facing "buggie" a.ka a stroller ride through the eyes of a child.
You may think oh what a drag a 10 minute video, however think of how 10 minutes to a baby being pushed alone in a strange world could feel like.. pretty scary huh?
The article in the U.K's National literacy trust website suggests watching for the following in the video.
0:20 - the buggy is squeezed between two parked cars
- 0:56 - a crowd of
people jostle past the buggy
- 1:43 - while waiting to cross the road, a 4x4
vehicle comes dangerously close to the baby
- 2:26 - automatic doors almost
swing into the buggy as they open
- 8:20 - the buggy steers between a forest
- 9:16 - as mum chats to the cashier, the buggy is abandoned down
I know if I need the stroller I will keep her in it as long as possible on the car seat so she may face me.. But whenever possible wearing you baby is one of the most loving things you can do with them.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
photo by Rhea Twilleager.
"I am a princess. All girls are. Even if they live in tiny old attics. Even if they dress in rags, even if they aren't pretty, or smart, or young. They're still princesses. All of us. Didn't your father ever tell you that? Didn't he?"
One of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies; Disney's "A little princess"
As a little girl, I grew up quite the daddy's girl, he would take me everywhere with him, and I felt so loved, so protected and so happy.
One day when I was around 5 yrs old things changed, my father was 23 he got into a really bad car accident that left him hospitalized and in therapy for months.. he lost partial use of his right hand. He lost his job, his confidence and he lost me...
He became a bitter person, angry all the time and he seemed to be constantly feeling sorry for himself and lashing out on everyone. I was not my daddy's princess anymore..
He had his moments though, but he showed them in odd ways.. he would buy my brother and I a coke and a bag of chips if we were good and cleaned the house, he would yell and hit us if we did not. My mom was always at work because she pretty much supported the family ever since that accident.
But I am not writing a sad story here.. going back to that quote.. it always makes me cry, because if every single woman had a daddy who treated her that way the world would be so different. A girl needs her mother but a girl really needs her father as well..
Don't get me wrong there are many different types of families and some families don't have a dad in the picture because of divorce or even death, or because the family is just a mom or two moms.. moms can act like a dad too and viceversa, but I am not going to get to into that right now..
all I want to say is I am grateful for my husband because he is a great father to both our daughters, they pretty much have him wrapped around their little fingers, as it should be.
You see the relationship of a girl with her dad sets them up for future relationships, how they want to be treated , respected, loved and protected. A woman isn't weak because she needs a prince to sweep her off her feet.. A strong woman knows what she wants, is strong enough to carry a household, work at or off the home (more often than not both) and still recognizes when she needs help and asks for it. Just like a father is no less of a man because he changes diapers and helps with house chores.
We are all princesses... some of us may not have had perfect fathers but I want everyone to know we are all princesses.. and we need to tell our daughters that. Especially if daddy is not in the picture.
Never degrade yourselves
Never let someone use you
Respect yourself and others
Be caring kind and sweet and be tough
but most important... please don't fall for douche bags! ;)
Love mom and dad..
all girls are princesses.... so to all of you mothers with boys, please raise knights, raise chivalrous boys, raise self sufficient boys that if maybe their wife had too much on her plate and laundry didn't get done they can do a load themselves, they can cook they can clean they can help their partner... and most important, raise a man that can father future princesses.
The world needs it.