NIP is PDA

I was reading up on a post on blacktating, about the use of the word "intimacy" while referring to breastfeeding. I think it is silly to have the word be put into question when it has a whole lot of meanings...

To me it's like saying I can't say I love my children because I love my husband. Love has a lot of meanings, I love my children, I love my husband, I love chocolate, doesn't mean it's all in the same context.

Wikipedia has an elaborate page on the word intimacy, the first lines state the following, "Intimacy generally refers to the feeling of being in a close personal association and belonging together. It is a familiar and very close affective connection with another as a result of a bond that is formed through knowledge and experience of the other". Wouldn't you agree that is something that is experienced while feeding your child?

Anyway, this is not what I am going to get into.. the whole post got me thinking..

NIP is PDA!

PDA originally refers to people being amorous in public. "public display of affection" be it kissing, holding hands, hugging... sure people think of it as a sexual term but if you think about it we as mothers when we nurse in public are displaying how much affection we have for our children.

Enough affection to not whisk them away to a bathroom, or a hot car or to keep them indoors because of what others might think.

So from now on I will say PDA not NIP ;)

You know you're addicted to cloth diapers when...

I confess I'm addicted to cloth diapers! and I love preaching about them.. and I know I'm not the only one. I'm compiling a list of symptoms.. we fluff-aholics need help! ...

You know you're a fluff-aholic when ...

You sign up for ever single cloth diaper giveaway you can find, so you can grow your stash! which brings me to...

You actually call your diapers your "stash"

You get excited when the mailman drops off a nice packet and you know fresh diapers are in there!

You know what AiO, Ai2,CD,PF,CPF,IPF, OC, OS, means and if you CW maybe you know about TTO? lol....

You have justified buying so many to yourself or your DH by knowing you can re-sell for almost the same price! but deep down inside you know you couldn't ever part with them.

You are obsessed with stain removal and laundry!

You proudly take your baby to their well baby visits with their best diaper on and get excited when they tell you to undress him/her down to their diaper ;)

You instantly bond with other CD'ing mommas.

You agree with the phrase "Real men change cloth diapers"

When winter comes you get sad that you have to put clothes on your little one and hide the cute diaper designs.

You proudly change your baby's diaper at public changing stations hoping someone asks about the cold diaper your baby's sporting!

You are happy when your baby finally potty trains but sad you have to put away your cute diapers.

Ok those are some I could think off... any of you have more?? :)

Forwards Strollers are scary....

I never thought about it... how a stroll ride could look in the eyes of a small child, especially a long one.
At one point I considered strollers as a great way for baby to get fresh air and yes they are but ideally during a long walk a baby should be worn safe in mommy/daddy's arms, hips, back.. or facing the pusher where baby can see familiar faces and be reassured.

I currently wear my baby or when necessary I stroll her with the car seat attached so that she may face me.I talk to her comfort her and make silly faces along the ride, I love seeing her reactions to the world.

I just saw this video produced by Norland College (Bath, England) it's a 10 minute video of a forward facing "buggie" a.ka a stroller ride through the eyes of a child.

You may think oh what a drag a 10 minute video, however think of how 10 minutes to a baby being pushed alone in a strange world could feel like.. pretty scary huh?

The article in the U.K's National literacy trust website suggests watching for the following in the video.

0:20 - the buggy is squeezed between two parked cars
- 0:56 - a crowd of
people jostle past the buggy
- 1:43 - while waiting to cross the road, a 4x4
vehicle comes dangerously close to the baby
- 2:26 - automatic doors almost
swing into the buggy as they open
- 8:20 - the buggy steers between a forest
of legs
- 9:16 - as mum chats to the cashier, the buggy is abandoned down
below

Norland College buggy ride from National Literacy Trust on Vimeo.

I know if I need the stroller I will keep her in it as long as possible on the car seat so she may face me.. But whenever possible wearing you baby is one of the most loving things you can do with them.

We are all Princesses....

photo by Rhea Twilleager.


"I am a princess. All girls are. Even if they live in tiny old attics. Even if they dress in rags, even if they aren't pretty, or smart, or young. They're still princesses. All of us. Didn't your father ever tell you that? Didn't he?"

One of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies; Disney's "A little princess"

As a little girl, I grew up quite the daddy's girl, he would take me everywhere with him, and I felt so loved, so protected and so happy.
One day when I was around 5 yrs old things changed, my father was 23 he got into a really bad car accident that left him hospitalized and in therapy for months.. he lost partial use of his right hand. He lost his job, his confidence and he lost me...

He became a bitter person, angry all the time and he seemed to be constantly feeling sorry for himself and lashing out on everyone. I was not my daddy's princess anymore..

He had his moments though, but he showed them in odd ways.. he would buy my brother and I a coke and a bag of chips if we were good and cleaned the house, he would yell and hit us if we did not. My mom was always at work because she pretty much supported the family ever since that accident.

But I am not writing a sad story here.. going back to that quote.. it always makes me cry, because if every single woman had a daddy who treated her that way the world would be so different. A girl needs her mother but a girl really needs her father as well..

Don't get me wrong there are many different types of families and some families don't have a dad in the picture because of divorce or even death, or because the family is just a mom or two moms.. moms can act like a dad too and viceversa, but I am not going to get to into that right now..

all I want to say is I am grateful for my husband because he is a great father to both our daughters, they pretty much have him wrapped around their little fingers, as it should be.

You see the relationship of a girl with her dad sets them up for future relationships, how they want to be treated , respected, loved and protected. A woman isn't weak because she needs a prince to sweep her off her feet.. A strong woman knows what she wants, is strong enough to carry a household, work at or off the home (more often than not both) and still recognizes when she needs help and asks for it. Just like a father is no less of a man because he changes diapers and helps with house chores.

We are all princesses... some of us may not have had perfect fathers but I want everyone to know we are all princesses.. and we need to tell our daughters that. Especially if daddy is not in the picture.

Dear Daughters:

Never degrade yourselves
Never let someone use you
Respect yourself and others
Be caring kind and sweet and be tough

but most important... please don't fall for douche bags! ;)

Love mom and dad..


all girls are princesses.... so to all of you mothers with boys, please raise knights, raise chivalrous boys, raise self sufficient boys that if maybe their wife had too much on her plate and laundry didn't get done they can do a load themselves, they can cook they can clean they can help their partner... and most important, raise a man that can father future princesses.

The world needs it.

Different Parents, Different Methods....

Mainstream and Alternative Parenting.

Notice I did not use Mainstream vs Alternative parenting.... I have been around the block when it comes to parenting blogs, forums, meet up groups, pages, chat, videos and anything you can find on the web where people come together to exchange ideas, opinions and their own experiences on the parental roller coaster.

The camaraderie, the support, the information, the places to vent are there and offer great support when you find yourself about to be a first time mom and have no idea what to do and all you can go by are family and friends input which is uninvited half the time.

With the good also comes the ugly; the debates, guilt, finger pointing, shame, anger and division that comes with being on opposites sides of an issue like breastfeeding, baby wearing, circumcision, birth control, discipline, food, schooling etc.. etc ..etc...

Why is mainstream ....well.... mainstream and the rest is alternative?
DO we not want the alternative to be the norm? and why is it called alternative if it's healthy and natural?

There's so many questions and in reality the issues are so complex and it's not so black an white!
I have friends that mix it up, they breastfeed but use disposable diapers, or formula feed but they cloth diaper and other examples as well.... thing is we are all learning together some things just come more naturally to some than others.

I could go on and on about the complexities of parenting and the many gray areas but I'm going to get to the point.

I breastfeed, I cloth diaper, I home birthed, I baby wear, I co-sleep, I am not sure what to do with vax yet I am waiting... I am try to be gentle (most days) I have my bad days just like anyone else
but I also have a daughter whom I had in a hospital, I formula fed, I strolled her around, she sleeps in my room but in her own bed very opposite.

I have been on both sides of the story and I have felt at one point "Attacked" by people ... like the person I am now. I later understood that I made the decisions I first made the majority of the time for lack of information. I was not a bad parent nor do I think people that parent differently are bad..

I want to let my friends and family who have different ways of doing things that I am not trying to change their ways, I don't feel self righteous, nor am I judging them. I just want to provide information so that maybe someone will try different methods of doing things.. or not.

All and all it's for the benefit of our children.

I once disliked people like myself.. but at one point a light bulb went off and it was when I stopped thinking they were judging me that I became more open to their suggestions and though this was for me.

I hope this helps ... just wanted to say we are all different and it is when we accept that we are all different that we find we're really the same all along .. we want what is best.

love,

Tanya.

Cloth Wipes are easy peasy clean up breezy!

As promised here's a segment on Cloth wipes.

Why Cloth wipes? well... the whole Eco-friendly natural parenting lifestyle has a ripple effect. Cloth diapers need Eco friendly laundry aides (I dislike calling them detergents since they don't have any) they need drying in the sun to eliminate stains thus using less energy and alas! They need cloth wipes.

Think about when you change a diaper. You wipe, you place a wipe inside the diaper and you dispose of it though in some places in Europe it is Illegal, and the World Health Organization is against it! why?

BECAUSE FECAL MATTER CARRIES DISEASE! you can read a nice article about that here.

I am guilty of doing it before and a lot of people are as well, the disposable diapers have instructions to flush the poop out first then dispose of the diaper... who does that? might as well be cloth diapering right? ;)

Back to cloth wipes though....



they're easy you can either make them yourself or buy them and you can do two methods

• The wet method: you place cloth wipes in a container or wipe warmer and you make or buy a diaper solution which consists of oil, water, soap and some antibacterial agent.

Here's a great site with a recipe on making your own cloth diaper solution.

• The Dry Method: You place the solution in an inexpensive spray bottle and spray your baby's bum and wipe or spray the cloth and then wipe.

The last one is my favorite because you don't have to deal with the wipes getting dry or musty.

You wipe excess poop from baby into the diaper and you flush that down the toilet, make sure you hold on to the diaper or you could loose it! then throw everything in a pail to either wash by hand or washing machine. And really I don't know if it's just me but my own kid's poop doesn't gross me out.. it's poop it comes with the territory!

Today I made a simple solution brewing chamomile and mixing it with water baby wash and baby oil. I will be experimenting with different solution as I go along to find the one I like..fun times right ;)

As for traveling this is my set up, simple and cheap! Hope this inspires you to try it out!
Would you like me to include some fancy cloth wipes made by myself for my next giveaway?

let me know! write to me on facebook!

Breastfeeding Rocks!!

A recent article by Nursing Freedom "Marketing Breastfeeding: your ideas" asked the following:

"How would you give breastfeeding a makeover so that women view it as glamorous, sexy, essential? Or fill in your adjective - what attributes do you think we can emphasize to make breastfeeding more acceptable, appealing, desirable to more women?"



First of all, think about the women who are having these babies?

They're women in their 20's who were born during the 80's grew up in the 90's

They are part of the Generation Y or MTV generation.



I remember seeing this image and thought oh yaay, breastfeeding rocks!

It's an Image of Jerry Hall nursing her baby and looking stunning!

I think Billboards or more magazine ads with musicians nursing their babies would be so effective, what if we would have had Gwen Stefani or Britney Spears doing nursing campaigns? Unfortunately Celebrities are a big influence in our generation and they know that! more of them should step up and encourage the general public.

We also know how successful MTV's "Teen Mom" has become, I wish some of those girls would have breastfed. Why not add a documentary about the teen moms who did choose to breastfeed.

The Bottom line is we need to have breastfeeding in the media , in more fashion magazines, more talk shows, more sitcoms. We need more Kourtney Kardashians, more Salma Hayeks, more Bethenny Frankels, More Gisele Bundchens out there!

Because Breastfeeding Rocks!