DUDE! where's my leaky b@@b?...

What a shock it was today to get a text from my friend Christy telling me that our beloved page, "The Leaky b@@b" had been deleted from facebook.

Back in August another breastfeeding related page shared a cute blog post called "oh My Gosh..I'm a LACTIVIST!" the post made me smile and made me realize that I too was a lactivist.. someone who with DD#1 I had previously misunderstood. I now was one, and I was delighted to realize it.. I read other posts by her and immediately "liked" the page for the blog on facebook.

What was different about the page is that people actively participated, Jessica the author of the blog interacted with it's followers on a daily basis, engaging in conversations, giving advice, making us laugh, supporting us. The page was not hostile, was not preachy, we all had a sense of camaraderie whether we breastfed, used to, planned to or couldn't. The page was really for support. I quickly felt at home and made many friends, it became my haven, my sanity not just for breastfeeding but for many of motherhood's challenges.

And with that text came shock! It was gone! but....
not for long! Bring back the leaky boob was created and 12 hours into its creation the page had 4000 followers, the leakies moved quickly and TLB spport was created for support and questions which is what the leaky boob was about.

Why was the leaky boob removed? Breastfeeding pictures... sweet pictures of cherubic faces being nurtured and showing no more skin than you would see in a bikini, which by the way you can find lots off on Sports illustrated swimsuit on facebook. Does that seem fair to you?

Facebook is punishing the wrong people while catering to others.. we need pages like the leaky boob!

what can you do?

if you are in the Palo Alto area there will be a nurse-in at facebook's headquarters Friday January 7th 2011 at 12:30pm

1601 S. California Ave. Palo Alto, CA 94304



write to your local news...

write to the Today show myself and others have done this if they get enough emails it might work.. if you want me to make a letter you can copy and paste let me know..

Tell Marc Zuckerberg how you feel on this discussion (be nice!).

change your profile picture

BUT most important.. stick together, please stop by and spread the word about TLB support because the most important thing is that leakies that need support, advice, encouragement and answers receive it!

They can take away the page but they can't take away our spirit of helping!

Toddler Formula marketing, what the %$%$?

The mail arrived... bills, junk mail, coupons.. and a new issue of one of those free parenting magazines, usually they go straight into the recycling bin because just like when watching "A Baby Story" on TLC , rarely is it helpful and often it is unnerving.

I was bored however and decided to flip through it.. oh yaay another Gerber ad, (glad my baby is not part of that generation!) ...ooh the newest stroller, (yaay I like my sling better!). The newest baby trends (Blech!) and then this... (You know the infamous chocolate formula but not chocolate anymore)

On the website it states:

"When your toddler is transitioning to new foods, ensuring complete nutrition can become more of a challenge. That's why we created Enfagrow PREMIUM Toddler, to help make sure he gets the nutrients he still needs — even after he outgrows infant formula"

See I've been on the other side of the coin, I formula fed my first and I remember the shock I got, to learn that WIC would be cutting us off from formula right at 12 months! I bought more formula and slowly "weaned" her off it and onto whole milk.. (boy I had no clue back then) I guess back then I would have felt relieved a thing such as this was available.

What bugs me is the fact that nowhere on that particular page does it have a disclaimer suggesting that breast milk is STILL best.. the other formulas they have marketed towards infants do! Can anyone tell me why they're off the hook on doing so, with toddler formula?) I guess they believe like many others that at 12 months you HAVE to wean a child. A better statement would have been:

"When your toddler is transitioning to new foods, ensuring complete nutrition can become more of a challenge. That's why your body still produces perfectly customized milk to help make sure he gets the nutrients he still needs"

on a page from Kellymom.com about extended breastfeeding (tough I feel the use of the word "extended" about something normal is arguable) there are many resources quoted including this one!

•In the second year (12-23 months), 448 ml of breast milk provides:
◦29% of energy requirements
◦43% of protein requirements
◦36% of calcium requirements
◦75% of vitamin A requirements
◦76% of folate requirements
◦94% of vitamin B12 requirements
◦60% of vitamin C requirements
-- Dewey 2001

There are many informative videos and resources out there! Even the World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding until at least 2!.

I sure do wish I had the money to buy advertising on magazines in order to "sell" "toddler breast milk".

As one mom's review on the Enfamil site stated:

"Easy on the go!
Just scoop some in a container, bring a baby bottle or cup of measured water and you're ready to quench your toddler's thirst when you are out and milk is not available (mall, beach, etc.)"

Maybe someone could reply to my fantasy ad campaign,

"Easy on the go!
Just put your toddler to the breast to quench his thirst when you're out and milk is not available (mall, beach, etc)"

Now which one seems easier?

The gray area of the Vax debate..

I have been MIA for a bit, mommy life is busy and our new baby adopted by 2 friends and myself "3 moms and a kitchen" has taken most of my time.

I wanted to take some time and write about something that has been on my mind for quite some time and it resurfaced again after reading a discussion on the leaky boob's facebook page.

The post asked about opinion on the vaccine issue from a certain perspective but someone replied asking a valid question "why is it that some of you ladies do not vaccinate, I don't get it" I am not quoting 100% but that was my take on the post..

it later turned into the usual heated debate pro vaccine and anti vaccine with a little bit of gray area opinions as well... I am in the gray area myself.

I want to answer that question from my point of view.. the middle of the road kind of view.

See I understand vaccines are literally a life saving discovery! They have warded off various diseases that have killed masses of population during outbreaks for example Polio is practically gone.. (at least in the U.S) according to the CDC "The last imported case caused by wild polio virus into the United States was reported in 1993." other cases that had surfaced around that time were brought from other countries where the Oral polio was still given as it is a live virus and thus did give polio to a small percentage of the vaccinated population.

Saying that, Here is my opinion on the matter..

Nothing comes without consequence...

x-rays, chemotherapy, amnios, epidurals, synthetic oxytocin, birth control, synthetic hormones, all great discoveries in the medical field that come with a price..

We do not know the long term effects of vaccines, we do not know if maybe they are part of the cancer problem, we do not know if they're part of our infertility problems, we do not know if they are part of our ADHD problem, we do not know if they are part of our Autism rise, we just do not know.

I am not saying that everything lies in the vaccines but I do know that if we try to be as natural as possible if could only work in our advantage. I personally do selective vaccination, I did not start my second baby on vax until 6 months and only had them give her DTap (due to the whooping cough outbreak) and Hib. Polio and HepB can wait for a bit, in fact I think I'll skip Polio all together.. the less foreign chemicals in her little body the better. Note: I do not advocate skipping vaccines or not vaccinating, it is up to you as an individual, to do your research and find out what you think is best.

Why not wrap her in a bubble? I know that I can't prevent her from other sources of chemicals and poisons, I am not 100% organic natural in my home but the less she can get the better. It s my duty as a parent to do what I believe is best for my child.

Some people believe formula and detached parenting is better in the long run and well that is what they think, they do honestly believe what they do is best, and I know some of you might be thinking well that is because they are ignorant (the same could be thought of a vaccinating or anti vaccinating parent)

Why the arguments? because parental guilt comes into play, part of me when I vaxed my second child wondered "am I doing the right thing?" and part of me as I write this knowing she does not have an up to date vaccine card like her older sister does, thinks.. "am I doing the right thing?".

I have read everywhere online, offline, talked to several sources and all the arguments are conflicting so I developed my own style.. I am doing this my own way for my own child.

I read a comment in there that someone had replied to them "people like you are the reason my child got whooping cough" My answer to them would be "if you child was vaccinated then why didn't the vaccine protect him?" "was he breastfed? (breastfeeding provides antibodies)"

We don't know...
But as a middle of the road parent rest assured.. I judge neither side.. at the end of the day we are trying very passionately to do what we think is best for our children. Only time can tell.

Be at peace with your choices, be proud of them but don't judge people who do things differently, as William Cowper said..

"Variety is the spice of life, that gives it all its flavor"

We are neither right nor wrong, we have options and we're using those options it's all we can do, it's our duty to explore them with caution.

NIP is PDA

I was reading up on a post on blacktating, about the use of the word "intimacy" while referring to breastfeeding. I think it is silly to have the word be put into question when it has a whole lot of meanings...

To me it's like saying I can't say I love my children because I love my husband. Love has a lot of meanings, I love my children, I love my husband, I love chocolate, doesn't mean it's all in the same context.

Wikipedia has an elaborate page on the word intimacy, the first lines state the following, "Intimacy generally refers to the feeling of being in a close personal association and belonging together. It is a familiar and very close affective connection with another as a result of a bond that is formed through knowledge and experience of the other". Wouldn't you agree that is something that is experienced while feeding your child?

Anyway, this is not what I am going to get into.. the whole post got me thinking..

NIP is PDA!

PDA originally refers to people being amorous in public. "public display of affection" be it kissing, holding hands, hugging... sure people think of it as a sexual term but if you think about it we as mothers when we nurse in public are displaying how much affection we have for our children.

Enough affection to not whisk them away to a bathroom, or a hot car or to keep them indoors because of what others might think.

So from now on I will say PDA not NIP ;)

You know you're addicted to cloth diapers when...

I confess I'm addicted to cloth diapers! and I love preaching about them.. and I know I'm not the only one. I'm compiling a list of symptoms.. we fluff-aholics need help! ...

You know you're a fluff-aholic when ...

You sign up for ever single cloth diaper giveaway you can find, so you can grow your stash! which brings me to...

You actually call your diapers your "stash"

You get excited when the mailman drops off a nice packet and you know fresh diapers are in there!

You know what AiO, Ai2,CD,PF,CPF,IPF, OC, OS, means and if you CW maybe you know about TTO? lol....

You have justified buying so many to yourself or your DH by knowing you can re-sell for almost the same price! but deep down inside you know you couldn't ever part with them.

You are obsessed with stain removal and laundry!

You proudly take your baby to their well baby visits with their best diaper on and get excited when they tell you to undress him/her down to their diaper ;)

You instantly bond with other CD'ing mommas.

You agree with the phrase "Real men change cloth diapers"

When winter comes you get sad that you have to put clothes on your little one and hide the cute diaper designs.

You proudly change your baby's diaper at public changing stations hoping someone asks about the cold diaper your baby's sporting!

You are happy when your baby finally potty trains but sad you have to put away your cute diapers.

Ok those are some I could think off... any of you have more?? :)

Forwards Strollers are scary....

I never thought about it... how a stroll ride could look in the eyes of a small child, especially a long one.
At one point I considered strollers as a great way for baby to get fresh air and yes they are but ideally during a long walk a baby should be worn safe in mommy/daddy's arms, hips, back.. or facing the pusher where baby can see familiar faces and be reassured.

I currently wear my baby or when necessary I stroll her with the car seat attached so that she may face me.I talk to her comfort her and make silly faces along the ride, I love seeing her reactions to the world.

I just saw this video produced by Norland College (Bath, England) it's a 10 minute video of a forward facing "buggie" a.ka a stroller ride through the eyes of a child.

You may think oh what a drag a 10 minute video, however think of how 10 minutes to a baby being pushed alone in a strange world could feel like.. pretty scary huh?

The article in the U.K's National literacy trust website suggests watching for the following in the video.

0:20 - the buggy is squeezed between two parked cars
- 0:56 - a crowd of
people jostle past the buggy
- 1:43 - while waiting to cross the road, a 4x4
vehicle comes dangerously close to the baby
- 2:26 - automatic doors almost
swing into the buggy as they open
- 8:20 - the buggy steers between a forest
of legs
- 9:16 - as mum chats to the cashier, the buggy is abandoned down
below

Norland College buggy ride from National Literacy Trust on Vimeo.

I know if I need the stroller I will keep her in it as long as possible on the car seat so she may face me.. But whenever possible wearing you baby is one of the most loving things you can do with them.

We are all Princesses....

photo by Rhea Twilleager.


"I am a princess. All girls are. Even if they live in tiny old attics. Even if they dress in rags, even if they aren't pretty, or smart, or young. They're still princesses. All of us. Didn't your father ever tell you that? Didn't he?"

One of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies; Disney's "A little princess"

As a little girl, I grew up quite the daddy's girl, he would take me everywhere with him, and I felt so loved, so protected and so happy.
One day when I was around 5 yrs old things changed, my father was 23 he got into a really bad car accident that left him hospitalized and in therapy for months.. he lost partial use of his right hand. He lost his job, his confidence and he lost me...

He became a bitter person, angry all the time and he seemed to be constantly feeling sorry for himself and lashing out on everyone. I was not my daddy's princess anymore..

He had his moments though, but he showed them in odd ways.. he would buy my brother and I a coke and a bag of chips if we were good and cleaned the house, he would yell and hit us if we did not. My mom was always at work because she pretty much supported the family ever since that accident.

But I am not writing a sad story here.. going back to that quote.. it always makes me cry, because if every single woman had a daddy who treated her that way the world would be so different. A girl needs her mother but a girl really needs her father as well..

Don't get me wrong there are many different types of families and some families don't have a dad in the picture because of divorce or even death, or because the family is just a mom or two moms.. moms can act like a dad too and viceversa, but I am not going to get to into that right now..

all I want to say is I am grateful for my husband because he is a great father to both our daughters, they pretty much have him wrapped around their little fingers, as it should be.

You see the relationship of a girl with her dad sets them up for future relationships, how they want to be treated , respected, loved and protected. A woman isn't weak because she needs a prince to sweep her off her feet.. A strong woman knows what she wants, is strong enough to carry a household, work at or off the home (more often than not both) and still recognizes when she needs help and asks for it. Just like a father is no less of a man because he changes diapers and helps with house chores.

We are all princesses... some of us may not have had perfect fathers but I want everyone to know we are all princesses.. and we need to tell our daughters that. Especially if daddy is not in the picture.

Dear Daughters:

Never degrade yourselves
Never let someone use you
Respect yourself and others
Be caring kind and sweet and be tough

but most important... please don't fall for douche bags! ;)

Love mom and dad..


all girls are princesses.... so to all of you mothers with boys, please raise knights, raise chivalrous boys, raise self sufficient boys that if maybe their wife had too much on her plate and laundry didn't get done they can do a load themselves, they can cook they can clean they can help their partner... and most important, raise a man that can father future princesses.

The world needs it.